Marriage

Just in case you thought I'd pull the punches, let's talk about one of the controversial topics right off the bat.
Gay marriage is a simple issue. The two big issues seem to be legal equality, and the "sanctity" of marriage. Here's how it breaks down, and why I say it's simple: equality under the law applies to all citizens regardless of religion, gender, sexual preference or social status. Therefore so long as it does not infringe on someone else's right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, it is a non-issue. Relationships between consenting adults of legal age, so long as it doesn't violate someone else's rights, fits that bill. Following that logic, having done nothing constitutionally wrong, homosexuals, transgenders and the like deserve equal protection under the law. That means same rights as straight couples. Same tax breaks, same hospital rights, same everything. We've tried this before: "separate but equal" is anything but.
As for the "sanctity of marriage," that seems to be a religious issue. Separation of Church and State means that sanctity cannot be legislated. In plain English: just because your church says it's wrong doesn't mean it should be illegal. If it doesn't violate anyone else's rights, it isn't constitutionally illegal.
So what does this all mean? Equal rights is, and sanctity is not a legal issue. So if "marriage is a sacred institution," the US government has no right in legislating, or even legally recognizing it. So either gays can get married because it is a legal status conferred on a couple by the government enabling that couple to enjoy certain privelages (such as tax breaks), or marriage is a religious ceremony, and legally everyone gets a Civil Union, or whatever you want to call it, regardless.
The counter-argument that bothers me the most is that inanity of "if we let gays get married, next we'll have people trying to marry a duck." Screw you. Since when is a duck able to consent to a legal union of any sort? And comparing children and animals to gays? Children are not able to consent (age of consent-- it exists for a reason) and animals aren't either. Homosexual adults are. This is a non-argument. You're just spouting idiocy and wasting everyone's time.
Recap: give equal rights and privaleges to couples consisting of consenting and legal adults because it is a legal issue, and either call it marraige for everyone because it's a legal status, or decide that marriage is a religious rite which the government has no business recognizing at all.
Why is this so hard?